The Forever Watch – David Ramirez ~ Read
Zombies are so not my thing. Vampires, demons, other supernatural critters I can mostly do. But definitely not zombies. Until I discovered Diana Rowland, author of the Kara Gillian Demon series, also wrote a white trash zombie series. And I loved this one almost as much.
The best thing is the trajectory its main character, Angel Crawford, takes. From white trash loser addict living with her alcoholic father to becoming an important part of the Zombie Tribe/Mafia, holding down her job at the morgue (free lunch) and getting it together enough to pass her GED and get into college.
Angel juggles this while trying to keep it a secret from the non-zombies in her life. She lives in a world where zombies are mythology, not actuality.
What I didn’t like was when Rowland carefully laid out the rules for being a zombie and then ripped them to shreds. Late in the series, one of the main characters inhabits another body belying the “has to be bitten to become a zombie” rule.
Which completely resets this character’s story, confuses the hell out of the reader, and blows up what could have been a really interesting subplot. Congresswoman meets zombie and falls in love … didn’t see that one coming.
(All the endearments and nicknames used in this series nauseate me. Zombie Mama and Zombie Baby are just creepy.)
Book 1 – My Life as a White Trash Zombie
Meet self-described white trash loser Angel Crawford. She’s in the hospital recovering from being left on the side of the road after a car accident the night before. She remembers being drunk and high, but she doesn’t remember the accident, and certainly can’t figure out why there’s not a scratch or bruise on her.
She receives an anonymous note telling her a job at the morgue is waiting for her and she has to keep it for 30 days or she’ll be turned into the police. Angel reports to work and discovers she has no problems with handling dead bodies but is a little squicked out when her stomach growls at the sight of brains.
Eventually, we learn that Angel left the bar with a stranger who tried to rape her and there was an accident. He died, and Angel lives, getting turned into a zombie. She receives anonymous notes and packages to help her acclimate to her new reality.
A string of murders reveals a killer who believes the only good zombie is a truly dead, beheaded zombie.
At the end of the book, Angel has made a remarkable turnaround. No longer able to get high due to the regenerative power of her zombie “parasite,” she has to face the hard truths of her life.
Angel’s very likeable. It becomes clear that she was handed a nasty life and figured she was going to be a loser the rest of her life, just like her alcoholic father. Before zombie, there was no reason to even try to do more than just survive by taking low-wage jobs she frequently quit or was fired from. Drugs, sex and alcohol were how she numbed the pain.
After zombie, she begins to see it doesn’t have to be that way. Changing won’t be easy but it’s the only way now.
Book 2 – Even White Trash Zombies Get The Blues
Angel’s kept her job at the morgue and gotten into the rhythm of being a zombie. She’s discovered the person who turned her was someone she knew from high school and is now a detective with the local law. Oh, and they’re a couple now.
She’s attacked in the morgue and a body goes missing. Of course, Angel’s blamed and gets suspended. Everyone, including her zombie boyfriend and his uncle, head of the local zombie mafia believe she did it. We’re only in book two of the series so it’s too soon to believe that she’s not the pill-popping, alcohol swilling white trash loser everyone already knows.
Determined to prove her innocence, Angel goes on the hunt and discovers a horror chamber of a lab experimenting on zombies. Run by Saberton Corp., which is looking for a way to militarize zombies and get a contract from the government.
Angel is abducted by the director of the lab, Dr. Kristi Charish, and forced to undergo experiments, one of which is to make another zombie, Philip. This has all kinds of consequences in later books, and lays the foundation for one of the main conflicts going forward.
Book 3 – White Trash Zombie Apocalypse
The movie makers are in town and shooting their zombie movie at the local high school. Angel nearly gets run over by a car and is saved by Philip but he disappears before she can thank him. Later, he forcefully holds her down while someone steals some of her blood.
The main thrust is that Saberton unleashes their experimental zombies into the midst of the locals dressed as zombie extras. It gets ugly, and not just the skin falling off kind of ugly.
As things get sorted out, Angel becomes a more integral part of the Zombie Mafia/Tribe, respected by the godfather, Pietro. Her ascent into the inner circle is fast. Still insecure about her place in the world, Angel works hard to earn and keep their trust, which sets up the rescue from the devastating flood at the end of the book nicely.
And Marcus, her boyfriend, still can’t seem to understand that making decisions for Angel is the exact wrong thing to do.
Book 4 – How the White Trash Zombie Got Her Groove Back
Uncle Pietro represents the knight in shining armor who rides in to rescue Angel with his wealth and power. This is less a judgement statement, than an observation that nearly all of us wish for a rich fairy godfather to ride in and save the day.
At the end of book 3, Angel and her dad have lost everything to a flood. Pietro rescues them from the roof of their home in a helicopter and offers a no-interest loan to get them into another. Angel is appropriately awed, humbled and fully accepts wanting to do the work it takes to have earned so much trust.
It’s been a year since Angel was turned into a zombie and she’s now passed her GED and is taking classes at the local community college. Along the way she’s learned she’s dyslexic and is developing processes which allow her to learn, and retain, the information.
Angel’s helping out in Dr. Ari Nikas’ lab, who’s trying to find a way to resolve the mess Saberton’s lab made of Philip. When Dr. Nikas steps outside the lab, he disappears. So does Uncle Pietro.
Road trip! From Louisiana, Angel and her compatriots drive to New York City to rescue both Tribe members and kick some Saberton ass. The plot is chaotic and messy in this one.
Mostly it’s running around New York City fighting, getting caught, escaping, kicking the wrong ass, then finding the correct ass to kick, nefarious deeds and at least one Saberton who becomes what he’s exploited the most in his life.
Adding to the mess is the bit of deus ex machina which allows Pietro to use a skill that shreds all the carefully explained methods of become a zombie to bits. Wow, okay.
What this does is upend the interesting subplot of romance between Pietro and the Congresswoman, who knew he was a zombie. That has to be completely discarded. The lie that Pietro is dead is allowed to stand as fact. Which, frankly, frustrated me.
One of the tenets I use when reading, and reviewing, is to meet the book as it is, not as I would have wanted. Rowland makes that difficult in book 4. Authors are allowed to upend everything, books are their creations, not mine. But still ….
Angel gets a good taste of big city life and being around people who want to help without expecting anything in return. Which is handy since everyone who’s not Angel seems to have tons of money with which to fund their operation.
Rescuing their Tribe members and getting back on track to take down Dr. Charish to keep her and Saberton from doing more nefarious things takes a lot of energy. Angel and her tribe wind up back home, but her addictive personality raises its ugly specter.
Book 5 – White Trash Zombie Gone Wild
It’s true. Once an addict, always an addict. Any addict is one action away from giving in to it again. Angel knows this, but when she figures out it somehow counters her dyslexia, she really doesn’t want to give it up.
Meanwhile, FBI agents are making appearances at Tribe owned funeral homes asking questions. And the Tucker’s Point Zombie Fest gets under way, featuring the film shot at the high school, High School Zombie Apocalypse. It’s supposed to be fun until a flash drive containing evidence of real zombies surfaces.
High on V12, Angel starts hallucinating, leaving her vulnerable and ashamed. This is where her pre-zombie life and after-zombie life couldn’t be more stark. Her old habits kick in and she figures she’s back to being a loser which could include losing the trust of the people who have become her tribe.
She is completely flabbergasted, and embarrassed, when the tribe continues to treat her with respect and dignity and insists on helping her. Which allow her to regain her self-respect and go after the flash drive and the man who’s bent on outing the zombies.
This plot’s a little messy too, but it hangs together in the face of swamp escapes, drunk starlets, and a newly made zombie who’s reluctantly part of the resistance against Saberton.
There’s a big set up for book 7 which is the last in the series, so everything should be wrapped up in a nice bow. I hope so, Angel deserves a grand exit after all the work she’s done in the series to improve herself and earn her education. I’ll always have respect for Diana Rowland for making Angel the kind of woman who dumps her man because he can’t stop telling her what to do with her life.
The Lost Plot by Genevieve Cogman ~ read
The Burning Page by Genevieve Cogman ~ Read
The Masked City by Genevieve Cogman ~ Read
- The Fated Sky – Mary Robinette Kowal ~ Read
- My Year of Creative Reading – M. Todd Gallowglas ~ Read (No review)
- Space Opera – Catherynne M. Valente ~ DNF
- Yaqteenya: The Old World – Yassar Bahjatt ~ DNF
The Invisible Library by Genevieve Cogman ~ Read
The Fated Sky by Mary Robinette Kowal ~ Read
Exhausted! By the time I got home Sunday afternoon, I was veering into walls.
Wow! Lots of interesting questions about contacting extra-terrestrial intelligence. While there was a massive amount of smarts on the panel, it was really cool to learn Vatican City has an observatory, and the director of the observatory, Guy J. Consolmagno, was on the panel.
“We’re always looking for ourselves.”
How do we not anthropomorphize aliens?
Maybe we should warn them about us?
What are we not including/asking?
What is our motivation for searching for extraterrestrial intelligence?
What are the consequences of contact?
Will aliens be truthful? (Based on human history, there’s been a lot of dissembling.)
Should we just remain quiet?
Should we be more powerful?
Would You Baptize An Extraterrestrial?
After the panel it was time for another swing through the Dealer’s Room, and find the line for a John Scalzi autograph.
What a great weekend!
Author: Chuck Wendig
Publisher: Harper Voyager
Publisher’s Blurb: Five hackers—an Anonymous-style rabble-rouser, an Arab-Spring hacktivist, a black-hat hacker, an old-school cipherpunk, and an online troll—are detained by the U.S. government, forced to work as white-hat hackers for Uncle Sam in order to avoid federal prison. Calling themselves “the Zeroes,” they must spend the next year working as an elite cyber-espionage team, at a secret complex known only as “the Lodge.”
… North Korea is like the crazy little brother that keeps kicking over the neighbor’s potted plants and dropping flaming bags of dog shit on their doorstep. You protect them because they’re your brother, but in private you drag them over the coals for acting like such an epic asshole. (p. 274)
I came to Chuck Wendig through the Miriam Black series. Miriam is one of my very favorite urban fantasy protagonists with her dark secret power which has driven her to a life of self-sabotage which makes most of us look sane and normal.
None of the characters on Zer0es come even close to being as interesting. Not even the AI called Typhon.
And while I enjoyed Zer0es as the perfect mind candy getaway, the story of five disparate hackers forced to make the choice between prison or hacking for a unknown government project read like a Michael Crichton thriller without all the horrifying deathly side effects.
I really wanted to like this book on a level other than a Lord of the Flies-esque survival of the best hackers against each other, conspiracy minded players with a cult like belief they’re on the righteous side, and a terrifying Ai which could have come from any wetware scenario.
The writing is smart, and often times thrilling. And as I said farther up, it’s a great afternoon read. But for me, it read like “been there, read that.” That’s not Wendig’s fault, I’ve probably been reading voraciously longer than he’s known how to string words together.
There are other books written by Wendig which interest me. I’m looking forward to catching up on Miriam Black. Zer0es just sort of missed the mark for me.