Journey with Cancer

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Driving home from work yesterday, I had to turn the radio off. The story about Elizabeth Edwards’ cancer returning upset me greatly. “That poor family,” I said.

I noticed they were careful not to use the word “metastasized.” It’s a horrible scary word. The doctor interviewed for the story said her cancer is treatable. NPR tiptoed around all of this.

The article linked to above is from Slate.com and offers more straightforward information. Many of you will recognize Shauna in this story. The drugs, the treatment, the hopes we all had for her full recovery. I can only hope that the Edwards family will have a better outcome than Shauna’s.

Stephanie here:
The piper’s name is Bruce Cotter and you can find more about him here

Shauna’s Obituary - thank you to Amy and Village Printers for donating their time and materials to do this in time to be handed out at the memorial service.

Stephanie here:
It was a beautiful service. For 90 minutes people got up and shared their memories of Shauna. We laughed and we cried, and always remembered Shauna for the strong, multi-faceted person she was.

Her mom told stories from the beginning of her life, using the theme that Shauna was always ahead of her time. At 9 months, she decided to walk and that was that. At 2 and a half, she wanted pretty panties like her older sister, Alana, but mom told her she would have to be potty trained first. So Shauna potty trained herself so she could have pretty panties too. At 3 she was speaking in paragraphs, while most children were trying to string sentences together. We could have done without Shauna being ahead of her time when she died from cancer.

Gamemaster Dan told of their gaming days and how Shauna would let him know that he was taking too long setting things up, “It’s 9PM and I haven’t killed anything yet!”

Pamela talked about a conversation she and Shauna had during which Pamela told her to come back and let her know everything was okay. The night Shauna died, Pamela’s large St. Nicholas, which has never fallen over before, was tipped over making Pamela believe that Shauna had kept her promise.

Debbi talked about being Shauna’s “butt buddy” in Japan and how in her last days, Shauna had still been able to laugh. They made up a list of Letterman like Top 10 things she would say when she got to heaven. #1 on the list was, “What? You mean I got here before Don Cherry?” (Hockey reference.)

Alana, Ron, Michael, Tricia, Vicki, Ashley, Aunt Peggy and a few others whose names I either do not know or have forgotten also spoke. (My apologies.) Craig said the thing he would miss the most was her good parking karma and her voice.

All too soon, it was over and the piper marched down the aisle playing “Amazing Grace.” It was deeply emotional.

The answer to Shauna’s question about how many people would be at her service is, “around 100+.”

Maybe someone who went to the reception can let me know how it was so I can post something here. I didn’t go because it was more than I wanted to take in at the time.

Stephanie here:
There will be a table at the Chapel of the Flowers to place physical remembrances of Shauna. If you have a special memento that you would like to share, bring it along and put it on the table.

Donations in Shauna’s name can be made to the Susan B. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation.

Stephanie here:
Shauna’s memorial service will be at 1PM on Saturday, 6 January 2007 at the Chapel of Flowers, located at 900 S. 2nd St. in San Jose, CA. Their phone number is: (408) 294-9663.

There will be a “pot-luck” reception after the service at Neptune Society, located at 798 S. 2nd St. in San Jose, CA.

Stephanie here:
Shauna left us at about 4PM PDT today.

I went to visit, sat with her and stroked her arm and talked with Craig, left at about 3. Shortly after that, she began the next part of her journey.

As information about her memorial service becomes available, I will keep you up to date.

Love,
SEA

Stephanie here:
I went by tonight to see Shauna. She is going fast. Craig said that just from this morning to this evening there was a vast difference. Her eyes no longer track and when they are open it means she is in pain and can’t rest. She is on morphine only now. Her head is angled back, mouth open and breathing laboured. She is getting really gaunt in her face.

It won’t be long before she leaves us. Craig thinks 3 days at the most and I tend to agree.

I don’t know what else to say right now. There isn’t much more to say I think. We have known Shauna would come to this for a while now. It’s simply startling in how fast it came.

Please keep Craig and Katie and Tricia in your prayers.

Stephanie here:
Shauna is still with us. She made it through Christmas and has slipped farther away. She sleeps most of the time now.

Lana (a friend of Shauna’s who is also a nurse) has been great about explaining the process to me. Things like not eating or drinking is part of it, which logically leads to dehydration. Running a saline IV to keep her hydrated would only prolong her agony.

Lana and her sister Linda, who is also a nurse, help backstop hospice care and make sure that Shauna’s had her pain meds (vicodin or morphine depending on whether she can swallow and keep it down without getting nauseous).

I have been going by after work and sitting with her so Craig can go run errands and try to take care of “normal” life stuff which is just incredibly hard right now.

The tv didn’t get installed yesterday because there was a miscommunication about the wall mount and cables. Craig has all the parts and a new appointment for installation on Tuesday. Of course, we are hoping Shauna will be around to enjoy it.

It’s hard to say how the girls are holding up. Craig is, as expected, a mess.

Lana, Linda and I are trying to work up a schedule so that we can spend the night with Shauna and allow Craig to try to get some sleep. If anyone else would like to help out, drop an email to stephanie at lunisea fullstop com.

Two things that made me giggle:
I completely missed with the bedpan the other night and we had to change Shauna’s sheets. She was incredibly patient and understanding as we rolled her from side to side while cleaning and changing. As we tucked her back in and I stroked her forehead I said, “There’s a reason I’m an historian because clearly I’m completely inept as a nurse.” She giggled a bit.

A bit later that same visit she wanted to put blistex on her lips because they are so dry. Talking is so hard for her and it was tough for me to understand whether she wanted me to do it for her or what. Finally, in a really strong voice she said, “I Do It!”

As I handed her the tube, Craig came out and asked, “Shauna, did you just say ‘I do it?’”

“Yes, she did.”

“That was Katie’s first complete sentence. ‘I do it.’”

I love her mightily and admire her strength even in these her last days with us. I will miss her more than I can say. I am sure I’m not the only one.

Hang in there with us and keep praying for a restful departure for our wonderful Shauna.